Thursday, January 22, 2009

Bribery

This morning I told Thing 2 that if he got all of his grades up to A's by the end of the semester (February 4) I would get him his own cell phone.  He was THRILLED at the opportunity to earn a cell phone which I suspect he wants only so he can text-message his little girl-friend who already has her own cell phone.  

Getting him a cell phone is something I've been pondering for a while now because he has options after school (go to the YMCA on the bus, go to science club, go to math club, go to the library) that Thing 1 does not have at his school.  And if he wants to do something after school and FORGETS to call me, it is a royal pain in the ass to track him down.  Plus it raises my blood pressure and I'd like to save dying from a stroke for when I'm in my nineties, not in my twenties.  Ok, OK.....thirties.  So getting him a cell phone would not be ENTIRELY for his happiness.  It would make my life easier which would make me a nicer person which would make everyone who has to live with me happier.  Sort of like Midol.

The catch is that his grades are all C's and D's.  This is due ENTIRELY to the fact that he is quite possibly the most distracted, forgetful kid on the planet.  His TWIN brother with the EXACT SAME DNA is getting straight A's because he does his homework at precisely the same time every day, remembers everything and has his school stuff anal-retentively organized.

So am I mean for setting him up to fail?  Honestly, if he can get his grades up to all A's in two weeks he will be performing a miracle and I will have to start taking him to church which means I would have to go to church which would fuck up my sleeping in on Sunday's rule and make me crabby.

I'm just hoping he will get all of his missing assignments turned in (we found several wadded up in the bottom of his backpack last night - COMPLETED WORK!!!) and stays more on top of what is going on at school.  But he is all jazzed that he might actually get a cell phone.  Yeah, I think I actually am mean.

Maybe I'll get him the cell phone when he does get all his grades to an A - even if it's after the end of the semester.  If I don't kill him first.

5 comments:

ms. changes pants while driving said...

hahahahahaa....... 20s!

oh! katy! i knew i liked you.

ChiTown Girl said...

Girlfriend, I am right there with ya! My darling boy, who, by the way, attended a very prestigious gifted school here in Chicago, is currently getting two Fs and a D in 3 out of his 5 classes!!! I want to strangle him!!!! He already has a damn cell phone (CSJ got it without consulting me!! Even after I said I didn't want him to have one!! Asshole!) so our thing is unless he gets his grades back up, he'll be losing the phone, and if his grades don't go up, he will be losing his little girlfriend!!! That's the bigger threat for him, so I'm sticking to it if it kills me :(

uncle al said...

What will loosing his phone every few days do to your blood pressure

Kate said...

Ok, so maybe you are mean.
But you're not in your 30s.
You're really in your 20s.
it's ok to admit you had your kids young. :op

C said...

Well, if you have teenagers and can still pass for in your 20's, that I'm going to give it a shot...I think it's more believable for me anyway b/c my kids are ONLY 8 & 11 (I'm NOT just saying that b/c I'm 2 years OLDER than you.)

My 2 are just like that--the 11 y/o is super responsible & organized with her work, all A's...the 8 y/o? Not so much. Although she's not at the C's & D's stage yet, she forgets to turn in homework that she's done, she's very unorganized, sloppy, and frankly doesn't give a rats ass bout grades or anything like that. It drives me crazy. Let me know if the cellphone bribery works, then maybe I'll try it in a few years.
~Christy