No Pictures

How is it that whenever Husband is gone, the cats decide it is time to shower me with the fruits of their labors as a sign of their everlasting affection for me?

One morning it was a dead rat smack in the middle of the front doorway. A VERY LARGE rat with a super long icky rat tail.

The next morning it was a rat HEAD and some rat insides. I don't know which parts, I didn't look very closely. I puked in the front yard on my way to the garbage can with it.

Today it was a bunny rabbit. A totally full grown bunny rabbit. And a decapitated mouse. Both bodies were all there as far as I could tell, the cats must not have been hungry.

Four more days. Only four more days.

On the plus side we do not have a rodent problem.

Hanging At Home

I realized I need to make time to blog because it gives me a much-needed break from all the academic writing I do for school and it is just fun! Everyone needs a hobby no matter how busy and this is mine. So. Marvelous Mom came over yesterday just because she was missing her kids. Daughter didn't get to visit with her but they have a lunch date next Sunday. But the boys were thrilled to have a willing participant for their game The Settlers of Catan. I haven't played it yet but I am going to - Marvelous Mom assures me that it's not nearly as complicated as some of the games they like. (Risk sucks donkey balls IMO.) My kids may never realize how lucky they are to have such a fabulous Nana but I sure do!!!

Puppy has survived the trauma of having his name changed - he was just too bossy and rowdy to be a sweet little "Peepers". He is a CHARLIE. And he isn't Grandmother's puppy, she will look after him while I'm gone for school during the day but is bound and determined not to get attached. "I don't even buy green bananas for God's sake Katy, I can't get attached to another dog!" (Stubborn old bat.) So while I am his favorite person, we have decided he is really Penny's puppy. Check out these pictures. Most adorable thing EVAH!!!

They are super good buddies and as soon as the little shit learns to go up and down the stairs so he can go to the door and let me know he has to pee, they can keep each other company while I'm at school.

I know he is big enough to go up and down the stairs now. (Such a big boy, weighs FIVE WHOLE POUNDS! LOL) But I haven't been able to convince HIM that he can do it. We spent half an hour on the stairs Saturday. I was armed with super yummy meat treats and lured him up one at a time. He got up three. Three stairs in half and hour. Gah. Having a tiny dog is a whole different set of training challenges from a goofy golden retriever puppy!

Things I've Learned Recently

The threat of No. Christmas. Gifts. is more effective on teenagers who ask for expensive things and have seen you return gifts already purchased.

Said threatened teenagers can clean/pick up/organize around the house much more effectively than they let on during the rest of the year.

Teeny-tiny puppies are harder to potty train than golden-retriever sized puppies.

It is possible to tire out a golden retriever after all - you just need a teeny tiny puppy to play with her.

Being self-employed really sucks when you ARE the boss and can't just ask for time off.

Internet shopping is the best invention ever. Bar none. Full stop.

Research and development funding would be better spent on developing everything the Jetson's have in their house than on sending us to Mars.

Some puppies eat their own poop - I will never be the same after finding out this particular little tidbit.

Whatever the electricity worker guys that fix our power when it goes out make is not enough, they all deserve a raise and a pony.

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Whoop it Up!!!

Happy Day at the Funny Farm

We have our first funny farm fresh egg laid by one of our very own chickens!!!

All Puppy All the Time

All I've been doing is homework, studying, and playing with the cutest puppy on the planet!

I think the goats thought he was edible...

Puppy love!

Puperazzi

Poor Peepers, it's not easy living your life in a fishbowl...

He just wants to get into character and lose himself in the role. (He's Pup-in-Boots today)

But instead his adoring fans keep asking, "How much is that puppy in the window? The one with the waggly tail?"

I am beyond smitten.

I Wasn't Busy Enough

So I went out and adopted a puppy. He's an 8 week old Maltese, Poodle, ??? mutt and the cutest freaking thing on the planet. It's official, I've lost my mind.

But when I saw the huge smile on Grandmother's face - the happiest she's been since her little dog died - I knew all the puppy training and work will be worth it.

Masochist

Look at these ridiculous goats - are they not adorable? I love the head tilts, they look so perplexed. They have settled in nicely and are eating their way through the blackberries and evil, evil scotch-broom in our pasture. Now that we've fenced it, our next door neighbors bring their horses over for a snack of grass sometimes and the goats don't mind them at all. Unless they move suddenly - that causes a mini stampede of goats running for their lives. Very very funny to watch them running from a horse who is just shaking his head to get the flies off.

I made it through the first round of cuts for grad school and interviewed with two faculty members last Saturday. Now all I have to do is pull my hair out while I wait to hear if I've been accepted. Hopefully it will be soon because I'd look pretty funny with bald patches all over my head.

Because I seem to get a kick out of torturing myself with too much to do, I've started a mini-war with a certain member of our local school board. So far I've spoken, ahem, VEHEMENTLY at two board meetings and written several letters to the editor - two of which got published. What I'd really like to do is lobotomize her with a rusty spork but judging from her lack of mental ability, it looks like someone has already beat me to it. I'll rant more about that in the future I'm sure, it is NOT OVER!

The end of the year insanity has begun at the kids schools. Schools plural. As in three. I cannot express what a relief it will be to have then all in the same damn place next year. Even if I do have to bribe the dean of students weekly so the Things don't get suspended for beating on each other in between classes. Daughter has already informed them that under NO CIRCUMSTANCES are they to speak to her, look at her, touch her, or let anyone know that they are related to her at all. I'm planning on putting fluorescent signs on their backs that say I AM [Daughter's Name] BROTHER! She will love it. The poor girl doesn't stand a chance. Between our impossible, weird, foreign and memorable last name, the Things *cough* reputation as "the super smart and slightly odd identical twins who beat the shit out of each other at school", and my over-involvement as a volunteer she will never be able to blend into the woodwork at school.

I have so much I want to write about - the recent legislation in Arizona, an amazing NGO working in Africa, awesome (and slightly scary) teaching blogs I've recently discovered - but it all has to wait until after June 13th when I will officially be a college graduate.

Someday I'll have enough time to do everything!

"Shagged By a Rare Parrot"

Really, is any further explanation necessary?

It's Almost My Birthday

And I want one of these...

more animals


more animals


more animals


more animals

So cute!  So tiny!  So prickly!

And it would be funny to watch my dumb dog try to make friends with a prickly little hedgehog.  She was afraid of the chickens, I wonder if she'd run away from these guys?

Greedy

I had a dream last night that some evil person gave Thing 1 & Thing 2 a pet snake for their birthday.  Not just ANY pet snake, a PREGNANT pet snake.  So we had a four-foot long boa constrictor and five or six shoelace sized boa constrictors.  Note to friends and family, if you give any of my offspring pet reptiles I will cut you.

Because I don't want a snake, I want a hedgehog.

Photo via http://www.englishforums.com/English/HedgehogPorcupine/2/hckxg/Post.htm

We Don't Have THIS Much Snow

Cats Are Good Company

While daughter and I were out braving the crowds at the mall on Black Friday, Thing Two was feeling worse and worse.  He just hung out on the couch and rested all day.  Then at about 3am on Saturday morning, the puke-fest began and the poor kid puked his guts out from 3am to about 9am.  He started to feel a little better and was lying on the couch when Princess came to cuddle him and make him feel better.  What a good kitty-cat!

My Extra Hairy Kid

The pouring down rain stopped long enough for me to sweep the leaves off our front porch and into a pile.  While I was sweeping, Thing one and Thing two were throwing the ball for the dog and they wore her out.

I don't know about you but when I'm all worn out from running after a slimy tennis ball the VERY FIRST thing I want to do is flop down into a pile of wet leaves.

I think she's really a secret agent for the government and this is her camouflage.  I hope she is comfy cause she sure as hell is not coming back in the house for awhile!

Go Dogs Go! (apologies to Dr. Seuss)

I escaped from home on Saturday morning to help cousin take four dogs on a long walk.  One of them is hers, one is mine and the other two are her parents.  

Cousin has been looking after our golden retriever this month while motherinlaw is staying with us so I run away from home on weekends to visit my fourth child.  With the addition of aunt&uncle's two pooches, it was an absolutely hysterical walk.  They all get along and the wrestling matches wear them out.  A tired dog is a good dog.

Left to right, my dog Penny, aunt&uncle's dog Mickey, aunt&uncle's dog Reggie and cousin's dog Oscar.  I cannot believe we got them all in the back of cousin's car - it's a good thing they are all friends!

Penny racing in the stream where we walk.  Reggie the Scottish Terrier is behind her but because his legs are microscopic, he has a hard time keeping up.

I thought the ferns growing out of this log were beautiful.  This walk is simply gorgeous.

Mickey is so cute I can't stand it.  Aunt&uncle rescued her from the pound and guess that she had been abused and/or neglected.  She's very skittish but this time she seemed to warm up to me and even let me pet her.

Getting outside, playing with the dogs, taking a nice long walk and catching up with cousin who is one of my best friends was a great way to clear my head and regroup for another week.

Dogs sleep in the strangest places

Stepmonster with a dog in her lap, a dog next to her and a dog on her...boob?  Hey, Sancho the Chihuahua knows where the softest bed in the house is!

Now I have to go update my life insurance before she gets on a plane to flay my flesh from my body for posting this pic.

(It was Dad's idea, I swear!)