Busy, Busy, Busy

This quarter - the last one of my M.Ed. program and my second to last ever - is really going to be a doozy. I am student teaching full time in special education, but splitting my time between 2 schools. So on Mondays and Tuesdays I will be in a class with Juniors and Seniors in the same high school my kiddos go to, while the rest of the week I will be in an 8th grade class at the middle school where I completed my history, social studies, and middle level humanities student teaching.

Plus a class on Wednesday nights (FOUR HOURS!!!) and another one on Thursday nights - both with all the wonderful hours of reading and writing necessary to be successful. Joy.

Today was my first day at the high school and I can tell it is going to be wonderful. My cooperating teacher is amazing. She's super organized, positive, supportive, collaborative, and is having me start right in teaching a unit I will write beginning next week. High school is very very very different than middle school though. It's so...QUIET! In the halls between classes, in the lunchroom, and in the classroom the kids just seem so quiet - it's unnerving! But I dare say after a week or two I will be grateful for a couple of quiet days a week. Ha.

So needless to say, this will be it for awhile. I'm officially up to my eyeballs. Again.

Just the way I like it.

The Haircut

At the beginning of the year, our "tough" class was 4th period. Whether it was that particular mix of kids, the fact that it was right before lunch and they were hungry, or the way the planets align between 10:04 and 11:51 over Madness Middle School, 4th period was usually a challenge. However, it slowly got better and better - while 5th period slowly devolved into the seventh circle of hell. By mid-November, 4th period was great and 5th period became barely controlled chaos.

We were doing an activity that required scissors and glue sticks. Superteacher was on the other side of the room and I had my back turned to Stylist Boy while I was answering another student's question.

I turned around when I heard the gasp. Stylist Boy was looking at his desk, upon which lay a not-insignificant amount of Girly Girl's hair. Hair that was no longer attached to her head. HOLY SHIT HE CUT HER HAIR!!! IN CLASS!!!

Keep in mind that I'm in a SEVENTH GRADE classroom. This student is twelve years old. And yet he could not refrain from cutting his classmate's hair just because it was in front of him and he had a pair of scissors in his hand.

Superteacher sent him to the office with a referral while I stood their opening and closing my mouth like a dying guppy. After she dealt with the miscreant and I recovered from my shock that a twelve year old kid chose to cut a classmate's hair "just because", we surveyed the damage. He cut a small chunk but only about an inch long so with a significant trim, Girly Girl would still have the same hairstyle. She was remarkably fine about the whole thing, brushing it off with "Don't worry, it's not a big deal." (Her best friend was practically hyperventilating - girl loves her hair.)

This kid is not special needs, he's remarkably bright - if unmotivated - and has caring parents at home. All I can think of to explain it is what Bill Cosby said oh so many years ago. Kids are BRAIN DAMAGED.

That was so not a possible scenario we covered in our teachers ed. program.

FYI

I love student teaching! Every day when I walk in the classroom I think "this is where I belong".

But blogging is not gonna be happening much, if at all, for the foreseeable future. I need 36 hour days.

The First Week

After going to bed at 8 o'clock last night and sleeping for almost 12 hours, I am now almost coherent enough to put together a bullet list of notable observations from my first week of student teaching at a very large, urban middle school.

* Getting up at 5 am every day is a lot harder than I remember it being.

* Middle school kids are AWESOME. And very funny, I have a hard time not bursting out laughing at least six times a day.

* Teachers work their asses off. I always knew this but now I've seen it first hand.

* Kids love a routine and settle in to one very quickly. It takes us adults a little longer though.

* It is possible for jeans to stay at thigh level - with the help of a belt - but it makes the boy wearing them like that walk funny.

* I need to figure out a system of making sure everything at home gets taken care of. Until that happens it is going to be a little hectic around here.

* When I walk in the door at any time from 3:30 to 7:30 at night I am exhausted and I don't even have any homework from my own program to do yet - not sure how that is going to work.

* My kids are awesome. They're getting their chores done, getting themselves off to school, fixing dinner, daughter is a great shuttle driver for her brothers, and I'm very proud of them for taking care of business without me standing around telling them what they need to do.

I Am

All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another.

~Anatole France

Reading this quote shook me up. I have spent years and years of juggling college with taking care of my home and family. During that time I took a year off of school because the boys needed me to be 100% available to them and, while I have never articulated it to myself or anyone else, school has always come second to what I need to take care of at home. Not in a my family comes first way - everyone I know feels that way - but in a 'I can quit school anytime because it is a hobby compared to taking care of things at home' sort of way. When people asked me what I did, my answer was always that I am a SAHM - although I hate that term and much prefer 'Home Executive' or 'Queen of my Domain'. My role as a student came second; "Oh yeah, I'm in school too."

But recently I was asked what I did and I answered "I'm a teacher". And immediately was overcome with sadness, or maybe more accurately, grief. My life has changed so much in the past year, changed in a deep, fundamental way, and my role has changed forever.

For almost fifteen years I cared for Grandmother. She also cared for me, especially at the beginning when my babies were small, but I took her shopping, to appointments, and at the end, made sure her medical needs were taken care of. Now she is gone and I spend a lot of time wandering around the house doing nothing while thinking about all the little things I miss doing for her.

Daughter getting her driver's license was another pivotal change for me, although I didn't realize it until a few days after the fact. She went to a friend's birthday party and came home without me having to drive her. She picked her brother up from tennis practice the next day because I was at work, learning more about being a teacher in the school I am student teaching at.

The boys do their own laundry, they took it over after Grandmother died without even asking me for help or to do it for them. She had done their laundry ever since they could remember; Thing 1 on Mondays and Thing 2 on Thursdays. As I watched Thing 2 fold his clothes the other day I had to go into my room because I started to cry thinking the completely ridiculous thought that he doesn't need me any more.

Don't get me wrong, I am glad my babies are growing up and becoming independent. After all, that is the whole goal of raising kids. And while I miss her desperately, I am glad that Grandmother is not in pain and suffering the indignities of old age anymore. But I need to allow myself to grieve the death of my old role, my identity as a SAHM, as I move ahead to my new identity as teacher, wife, and mother of increasingly independent teenagers - soon to be college students and adults.

I have floundered this summer, not getting a lot done and spending hours doing nothing but thinking about the past. Reading the quote from Anatole France made me realize what has been going on, one life has been dying as I prepare to step forward to my next life.

I am a teacher.

Gratuitous Whining

Getting back into the swing of reality after a trip of a lifetime is a drag.

I know, shut up Katy, what a first-world problem to have. May you all have such a problem to deal with someday.

Thing 1 has decided to swap band for tennis, Thing 2 is taking driver's ed classes, and daughter has a bazillion dance classes/practices every week. Next week is going to be especially exciting because it is the infamous BAND CAMP WEEK.

Not THAT kind of band camp. You pervs. The kind of band camp where the marching band, dance and flag teams practice for 6-8 hours a day (I hear it's more like 12 in college) for a week in preparation for football season and, in the case of our high school, the parade they march in that kicks off the state fair in our city. So even though Thing 1 isn't in band, daughter is on the dance team and has practice every day next week. Thing 1 has tennis practice every morning next week and Thing 2 has drivers ed class every day next week. And I have 2 full days of workshops and seminars to get ready for student teaching.

But on the plus side, daughter WILL pass her drivers test tomorrow at 11am Pacific Time (cross all your fingers and toes for us will ya?) so she WILL be able to get herself and her brother to practices. Husband is gonna have to pick up the slack on the two days I'm learning about student teaching, I just have to tell him.

And after school starts we will be juggling two different district calendars - the district where I'll be student teaching and the district where the kids go to school - as well as all the kids extracurricular activities and my twice-weekly evening classes. Ugh.

But my student teaching is only for seven months. I can do anything for seven months.

I hope.

Teachers Make Too Much Money

By Sarasota Values Education on Friday, February 18, 2011 at 8:32pm

Are you sick of high paid teachers? Teachers’ hefty salaries are driving up taxes, and they only work 9 or 10 months a year! It’s time we put things in perspective and pay them for what they do - baby sit! We can get that for less than minimum wage.

That’s right. Let’s give them $3.00 an hour and only the hours they worked; not any of that silly planning time, or any time they spend before or after school. That would be $19.50 a day (7:45 to 3:00 PM with 45 min. off for lunch and plan — that equals 6 1/2 hours).

Each parent should pay $19.50 a day for these teachers to baby-sit their children.

Now how many do they teach in day…maybe 30? So that’s $19.50 x 30 = $585.00 a day. However, remember they only work 180 days a year!!! I am not going to pay them for any vacations.

LET’S SEE…. That’s $585 X 180= $105,300 per year. (Hold on! My calculator needs new batteries).

What about those special education teachers and the ones with Master’s degrees? Well, we could pay them minimum wage ($7.75), and just to be fair, round it off to $8.00 an hour. That would be $8 X 6 1/2 hours X 30 childrenX 180 days = $280,800 per year.

Wait a minute — there’s something wrong here! There sure is!

The average teacher’s salary (nation wide) is $50,000. $50,000/180 days = $277.77/per day/30 students=$9.25/6.5 hours = $1.42 per hour per student–a very inexpensive baby-sitter and they even EDUCATE your kids!

WHAT A DEAL!!!!

(I lifted this from ChiTown Girl who lifted it from Ricochet - thanks for sharing, I think this is something everyone should be required to read.)

Brutal Honesty

My senior thesis is a play. Yup. When the opportunity presented itself I took the plunge and wrote a play instead of yet another research paper. This from a student who has taken ZERO creative writing courses. I took English 101 and 102 and then lost myself in the awesomeness of history and political science classes.

Naturally my play is historical. It's about the Nat Turner slave rebellion of 1831. With Malcolm X. Take my word for it, it works. I'll put it out here eventually - my vision is for it to be part of an entire curriculum for high school students about slavery and racism in the United States. For now you just have to take my word for it that it's come together quite nicely.

And that is entirely due to all the amazing feedback I've gotten from real live high school students.

One of the benefits to being a serial volunteer is all the contacts I've made at my kids schools. The drama teacher at the high school is amazing. According to all the performing arts parents he walks on water, and judging from the exceptional quality of his students performances I'm inclined to believe them. He was kind enough to allow me to borrow one of his classes to be guinea pigs for my play. After my first draft was complete I took it in, they did a table reading, and then gave me their feedback.

I was amazed at how articulate, thoughtful, and helpful their comments and notes were. It was exactly what I needed to make my project something that might actually be useful rather than just mental masturbation for a grade.

My re-write was substantial - all based on their feedback. I changed the format, scrapped the ending and wrote a new one, and added dialogue. Today I went back to amazing drama teacher's fifth period class and they did a second reading of my play. (I brought cookies and brownies this time, don't want them to feel unloved and taken advantage of!)

Again they blew me away with their maturity and I now have a kick-ass play. Well - as kick-ass as it can be coming from a non-playwright.

But - my favorite comment of ALL TIME was from one kid who came up to me as they were packing up their stuff in preparation for the bell to ring.

"That was SO much better Ms. Whatever - I actually ENJOYED it this time!"

Brutal honesty. I love it!

This is SO COOL!

I've Changed My Mind

The Pacific Northwest is the nicest climate I've ever lived it.  I was born in Juneau, Alaska and let me tell you, if you think it rains a lot in Seattle you have never been to Southeast Alaska.  Southeast Alaska gets 54.4 inches of rain a year while Seattle gets 37 inches.  

However, I did move to the Pacific Northwest at age 5 (almost) so I really don't remember Alaska very well.  But I am convinced that I lived in the tropics in a previous life because I love sunshine and hot weather - I even dream about hot sunny weather!  The letdown of waking up to another cold, gray, drizzly, Seattle day after dreaming about hot, sunny weather is a real bitch, let me tell you.

I belong here:

Or here:

Definitely here:

So forget teaching, I think I'm going to run away to Mexico and become a bartender or a beach bum.  I could really use some sun...

Being a Teacher

This quarter I am taking my first Education class in my (seemingly) never-ending quest to become a high school teacher.  This class is titled "Adolescents in Schools and Society" so if nothing else it should help me to live through my children's teenage years without killing them.  

I really like the Professor so far, she has been teaching for upwards of 30 years and has been a high school psychologist for the past 15 years so she Knows. Her. Shit.  Plus she's engaging, funny and warm - all very good qualities for a college professor!  Yesterday we watched about 50 minutes of the documentary film, American Teen and then talked about the issues the kids in the movie were facing.  (Great movie, put it on your Netflix list!)

Before watching the movie we talked about teaching in general, she shared some stories and talked about what we would be covering over the quarter.  One thing she is emphasizing is having us think about what our own teenage experience was and making sure we don't project it onto the kids we will (hopefully) be teaching in the future.  She said it was something she has seen teachers and administrators do time and time again so she wants to help us avoid falling into that trap.

Now I was a teenager more than a few years ago and because my own kids are teens (or close to it) I thought that rather than projecting my own teen experiences onto my students, I might have trouble projecting my kids experiences - they are, after all, much more fresh in my mind.  But as we watched the movie, my biggest problem was with the PARENTS.  All four kids they were following had parents that made me want to bitch-slap them at one point or another.  One girl was doing shots of tequila with her friends in her BEDROOM with no sign of parents anywhere, another boy's father was discouraging him going to college if he didn't get a basketball scholarship and on and on.  I realized that when I start teaching, I will need to be very aware that my own parenting is not something that I can project onto other people and be careful not to judge other parents for doing things differently than I would.

All parents judge other parents for doing things differently than they would do themselves, I think it's human nature, but when you are a teacher this can be problematic and get in the way of helping your students.  Or can it?  My Professor said it is something she has grappled with in her years of teaching and if you are aware of it, it doesn't become an issue.  But how can I teach kids when I think their parents are complete and total morons who are making things worse, not better?  

I hope there is a class in Dealing With the Parents in the Master's of Education program I'm applying for.