Fresh Start

I read somewhere that when you tell other people about your resolutions, goals, changes you plan on making - whatever you want to call them - then you are much more likely to follow through. My follow through sucks donkey balls so I'm putting my resolutions out there for everyone to read, in the hopes that it will help me follow through.

I will drink more water and less red wine.

I will listen to my kids more carefully - even when i don't know what the hell they're talking about.

I will vacuum at least once a week. Three times a week would be ideal but let's not get carried away.

I will floss my teeth every day.

I will treasure the time I have with my family, especially Grandmother. Even when she is being extra cantankerous.

I will take time every day to think about how damn lucky I am to have a healthy family, a loving husband, food to eat, and a cozy home to live in.

And I will cuddle these guys every chance I get...

Happy New Year!

Things I've Learned Recently

The threat of No. Christmas. Gifts. is more effective on teenagers who ask for expensive things and have seen you return gifts already purchased.

Said threatened teenagers can clean/pick up/organize around the house much more effectively than they let on during the rest of the year.

Teeny-tiny puppies are harder to potty train than golden-retriever sized puppies.

It is possible to tire out a golden retriever after all - you just need a teeny tiny puppy to play with her.

Being self-employed really sucks when you ARE the boss and can't just ask for time off.

Internet shopping is the best invention ever. Bar none. Full stop.

Research and development funding would be better spent on developing everything the Jetson's have in their house than on sending us to Mars.

Some puppies eat their own poop - I will never be the same after finding out this particular little tidbit.

Whatever the electricity worker guys that fix our power when it goes out make is not enough, they all deserve a raise and a pony.

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Whoop it Up!!!

Weeks into Minutes

October 24th was Daughter's sixteenth birthday. The extended family came, I ordered fancy cupcakes, the house was decorated in black and white Halloween decor, I hung a fancy banner I made in AUGUST (knowing I wouldn't have time to make anything after school started) and we all had a fabulous time - while Daughter spend the entire party in her room, sick with what we later realized was a very nasty case of the flu.

The Undertoad had struck with a vengeance.

But Grandmother got to hold the newest member of the family for a long time while he napped. Here they are, the newest and oldest members of the family - Grandmother 94 and Bubba 7 weeks.

The Undertoad was nowhere to be found the following weekend though! BFF Cousin and I took Daughter, Bee, Baron Munchausen, and Monty to Seattle for an overnight adventure. We shopped, took a limo from the hotel to dinner, our limo got INVADED by zombies leaving ZombiCon at the Seattle Center, Baron M tried to start a food fight at Buca de Beppo's, we played games at GameWorks and then walked back to the hotel in the rain stopping for lots of funny pictures on the way. Like this one...

Four teenagers = three 6s Get it? Six-Six-Six? Teenagers are evil? Nevermind...

Then this past weekend, the Undertoad returned. Grandmother's sweet little dog George went to the big pet park in the sky. He was fourteen - born the same summer as the Things - and will be sorely missed by everyone.

It's been a roller coaster for the past few weeks, and with the holidays fast (way too fast) approaching it promises to continue. But we're hoping for no more Undertoad in our lives for a very long time.

Independence Day

We had a fabulous holiday weekend! On Friday night I dropped daughter off at the marina in Seattle where Marvelous Mom and Stepdan park (moor? float?) their sailboat. She sailed to Poulsbo with them while Husband and the Things and I drove over on Saturday.

I have to note that this is the first time in two years that Husband has joined us on an overnight vacation other than going to Chelan with his brother and family. I was THRILLED that he said, "Screw work, I'm coming too!"

I had a few hours in Poulsbo with my guys before the sailors arrived. Aren't they handsome fellows?

Me and my boys - they're both taller than me, yikes!

And here comes Daughter and Stepdan in the dingy to motor us out to the sailboat that was anchored in Liberty Bay.

And this is just too cool for words. There is a teeny-tiny aquarium on the waterfront in Poulsbo and their resident Giant Pacific Octopus was eating a crab. Apparently they crack the crab's shell with their beak, suck all the guts and stuff out, and then drop the empty shell. That crab that you can see in the middle of the suckers is bigger than my hand!

It was a lovely weekend and I'm bummed to be back. (Mostly because I have 24 hours to write my mid-term essay.)

I hope y'all had a fun and safe fourth too!

Thanks Dad

Thanks for teaching me how to ride a bike.

Thanks for giving me your sarcastic, smart-ass sense of humor.

Thanks for tough love.

Thanks for taking me camping and not making me bathe the whole time.

Thanks for scaring the shit out of me on your little sailboat.

Thanks for showing me how to weld and use the torch for my middle school project.

Thanks for taking me to baseball games and letting me throw the peanut shells on the ground.

Thanks for making me play sports even in the rain because you never let your team down.

Thanks for encouraging me.

Thanks for always loving me and making me feel special.

Thanks for being the first man in my life.

I love you.

Fourteen

Fourteen years ago my babies were in incubators. They were super tiny and stayed in the ICU for two weeks. When they came home, outfits in "preemie" size were too big.

Now they are taller than I am, super handsome, and FOURTEEN YEARS OLD!

And I have a lot more gray hair.

Happy birthday Thing 1 and Thing 2, I love you both to the moon and back!

Beautiful Easter Babies

These two little Easter babies are too cute not to share. They are Spanish Teacher's baby girls all healthy, off oxygen (hooray!) and dressed up for Easter. You can't see it in this picture but their outfits have ruffled bloomers!!!

*passes out from the cuteness*

I had a rotten Easter (sick - ugh, stayed home to do homework - double ugh) but these beautiful Easter egg babies more than cheered me up. If only they didn't live in Denver so I could kiss them and squeeze them and hug them and call them George whenever I wanted to.

But there is another baby girl coming into the world any minute now and she lives nearby so I'll be able to get my baby fix anytime I want. Woot!

Gratuitous Cute Kid Pics

Here is Thing 2 playing with Sillyboy in the water trough...

And me with Princess A...

I miss the little rugrats!

The Cousins Invade

We got the very best Christmas surprise ever - COUSINS! Army Cousin called me a week or so before Christmas because he was getting to bring his two beautiful kids to Washington to spend Christmas with his whole family and they were going to stay with us!!! Since daughter was off wrestling Sharks With Frickin' Lasers in Australia, we had one bedroom vacant; the Things offered to bunk together so another bedroom would be vacant and voila - instant Christmas chaos!

Princess A is six and Sillyboy is four - I had forgotten how much FUN little kids are to play with! I got to be a Tickle-monster and chase them all over the house (boy am I out of shape!), cuddle up at bedtime to read them stories and just hang out and get to know them better. I hadn't seen Princess A since she was nine months old and I had never met Sillyboy so their visit was truly a gift for all of us.

The added bonus was getting to hang out with one of my favorite cousins who - because of his penchant for flitting around the damn globe every six months rather than staying put like a normal person - I have not got much time to hang out with since we grew up. His Mom took care of Scientist Genius Brother and I a lot when we were little and we always had such a great time playing cops n' robbers, cowboys n' indians or just running all over the yard "shooting" each other and yelling our fool heads off. He is smart, funny, loving and a *wonderful* father to his kids and I'm so glad we got this time to spend together.

Here he is with his beautiful babies...

Princess A and Thing 2 really hit it off and spent hours playing Legos together. He told me just the other day that we need to send her some Legos for her birthday because she loves them so much.

Army Cousin and I took all the kids to the Seattle Science Center one day and the Things had a great time showing the kids all the cool stuff. They are so good with little kids and were a big help to us keeping track of them! (Another thing I forgot, how fast little kids can disappear from sight!)

Princess A and Thing 2 at the GIANT table and chairs. I thought this was hilarious!

This Christmas was so much fun for all of us. I couldn't have asked for a better gift than time with my family and all the giggles, hugs and love from Princess A and Sillyboy.

I hope they come back soon!

Baby Boom

Recently on Marvelous Mom's side of the family we have experienced a baby boom. I don't know if it is something in the water, genetic crops or alien interference but just to be safe I've been making Husband sleep on the couch. With my luck I'd get pregnant with quadruplets if I let him sleep in the same bed as me and then I would have to jump off a bridge. So we're playing it safe and enjoying OTHER people's babies.

This is my cousin with his first child Adorable. She is the most beautiful baby girl ever and we all fought over who got to hold her. He finally got a chance at the end of the evening. Don't feel sorry for him, the lucky dog gets to live with her.

This is my OTHER cousin's beautiful baby girl Sassy who is just a wee bit older than Adorable and so freaking cute I wanted to eat her up. Does the drool on my chin show up in the photo?

Here is (from left to right) Marvelous Mom, Aunt J and Aunt L with baby Adorable. Aunt J is Adorable's grandmother and so proud that her buttons were bursting. Adorable was making her presence known. I'm pretty sure they could hear her in the next state.

And here I am holding Adorable. It's amazing but I'd forgot how tiny new babies are! She is just a little love and I can't wait to see her again.

I've got a TON to tell y'all about so I'll try to get cracking before my schoolwork buries me again.

Happy New Year!

Thankful

This year's Thanksgiving festivities went off without a hitch. We had 22 people to our house for Thanksgiving dinner and there was enough food, lots and lots of laughing and nobody got into a fight - even my offspring got along!

I am thankful that Dad, Stepmonster, Marvelous Mom and Stepdan all get along and can celebrate the holidays with us so my kids - and everyone else, it means the world to us - can have their entire family together without any fighting, drama, histrionics or even snide comments. (Except for Grandmother and she makes snide comments to EVERYONE without discriminating!) There are not enough words in the world to tell you four how much this means to us, we love you all so much!

I am thankful that after almost 16 years, husband still enjoys spending time with me and my family and that we love each other more now than when we were married.

I am thankful for the newest addition to the family, Grande - it was the icing on the cake to have a beautiful, happy baby to hug and squeeze! The only hard part was sharing him.

I am thankful that Grande has the same shape head as my Dad and not the same shape head as Thing 1. There is a reason Thing 1 doesn't have a buzz cut, I'm just sayin'... But seriously, aren't these two adorable? Grande with his Great Uncle Al.

Is it just me or do they both bear a striking resemblance to Charlie Brown?

I am thankful that Scientist Genius Brother was able to come up from Berkeley to join us. He is the bestest brother in the world and we are so freaking proud of him! Grandmother was especially happy to see him since it had been a while and she hardly let him leave her side the whole evening.

And last but not least, I am thankful for a certain (almost) 94 year old lady. Grandmother is doing amazingly well - I'm convinced she is made out of flubber - and continues to amaze, astonish, frustrate and annoy me. I wouldn't have it any other way!

I have so many things to be thankful for - my health, red wine, a beautiful home, sleepover summer camps, the opportunity to go to college, midol - but my family and friends are the most important things in my life and I love you all so very much.

OMG, I'm So Not Ready

In looking at the calendar today and trying to figure out how I'm going to get everything done between now and Christmas I realized that daughter leaves for Australia in THREE AND A HALF WEEKS!

This trip has been in the works for ages so I don't have the excuse of not knowing ahead of time but it was like "oh Christmas, well that's a LOOOONG time away yet". Except now - it's not.

I have to shop for gifts, make sure she has everything she needs, square it away with her teachers, and have a meltdown about letting my baby go to the other side of the world without me and I have to do it all in THREE AND A HALF WEEKS!

Where's a paper bag - I'm pretty sure that hyperventilating comes next.

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween!

Be spooky, be scary and be safe

From Whateverkaty, Husband, Daughter, Thing One and Thing Two!

Halloween Homecoming

This is the reason I can't get anything done around here! I doctored these photos on Picnik, a photo editing site that costs about $25 a year and is worth EVERY penny. (Husband might not agree on that point so we just won't mention anything about it to him, it'll be our little secret.)

Here is the version that daughter created and will be putting in a frame in her bedroom. Isn't it pretty?

Here is the version that Thing 2 and I created using all the fun Halloween editing tools. Can you find the ghost hiding in the picture? Aren't the wounds funny? Thing 2 wanted me to put the pumpkin over his sister's head so it would look like Cam was taking the headless horsewoman to homecoming but I drew the line there. I do like the spider on Cam's shoulder though!

It's so much fun to NOT act my age!

Happy Easter!

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Spring Has Sprung

The first day of spring is a BIG DEAL in Iran and by extension, for Iranian families all over the world.  Iran is on a lunar calendar and the first day of the year is the first day of spring - TODAY!  Homes are cleaned from top to bottom in preparation of the day (My Mother and sisters in law have been cleaning and scrubbing their houses for for weeks.  I did the dishes and vacuumed this morning.  Yay me!) and schools and businesses are closed for a couple of weeks to give everyone a vacation.  I haven't been to Iran for this holiday yet but from the descriptions from Husband and his family, it sounds a lot like the last couple weeks of December here but without the trampling stampedes of shoppers at the mall.

Because we live here and the kids are American in every way except the half of their blood that gives them unibrows and lets them get a beautiful tan in the summer, we make an effort to "do" as many Iranian holidays as we can so they can get a little bit of the culture and heritage of their father.  The Persian New Year, Noruz, is a fun one involving picking out a fish, dying hard-boiled eggs and trying to get something green to grow in time for the holiday.  These are all for the sofreh-ye haft-sinn (I call it the haftseen because honestly, who can remember all those weird words) which means 'Seven Dishes Setting' and is a sort of tablescape of things that each represent something.  

All seven things start with sinn (the letter S in farsi) and represent different things.  Rebirth is represented by sprouts - usually wheat or lentils - but I thought it was supposed to be grass (hard to believe we've been at this for 15 years huh?) so I grew grass seeds in a flowerpot.  Husband and I had a race, he was trying to germinate them on a plate covered up by a wet paper towel but I thought that was totally idiotic so I planted them in dirt and mine grew - his didn't.  WIN!  

Health and beauty are represented by apples.  No problem.  I bought some at the grocery store. 

Love is represented by senjed which apparently is the dry fruit of the wild olive.  It's unobtainable in regular grocery stores so Husband had to pay a ridiculous amount of money at the Persian specialty food store for approximately 8 of the little fuckers.

Garlic represents medicine.  Another easy one, throw a head of garlic in the grocery cart with the apples.

Sumac represents the color of the sunrise.  Apparently when the sun comes up on the new year, good conquers evil.  I was not burned into a pile of ashes this morning so I am suspicious of the validity of this particular claim.

Vinegar represents age and patience.  (I just realized I don't have any vinegar on my haftseen - FAIL!)  How perfect is that?  Aren't old people "vinegary"?  God knows Grandmother certainly has her vinegar-fueled moments!  I don't know about patience but vinegar is a perfect representation of age.  These Persians are pretty smart.

Plus you put colored eggs (Hey!  The Easter Bunny has a Persian cousin called The Noruz Bunny!) in a dish to represent fertility.  I hard boiled the eggs first because babies?  DO NOT WANT!  Everyone has other things they put on the haftseen and Husband's family has always put a copy of the Koran on theirs.  I did too because 1. we have a very pretty one that was getting all dusty anyway and 2. I will be sending a photo of the kids in front of the haftseen to Husband's family and they are devout and I don't want them to know that their daughter in law is evil.  

The last thing on the haftseen is a goldfish (we cheated this year) which represents life and the end of the astral year associated with the constellation Pisces.

I totally cribbed all this info from THIS BOOK which is a cookbook/cheat-sheet for people interested in Persian cooking and culture.  The recipe for noodle soup on page 66 is the best soup ever!

So we're going to have a nice Persian dinner tonight (if I ever get my ass in the kitchen and start cooking it) and then on Sunday we'll have dinner at Brotherinlaw & Awesomesisterinlaw's house where we will stuff ourselves on her awesome cooking (think Thanksgiving dinner with different food) and give the kids presents and crisp new money for the new year.

Here is a pic of a haftseen from the Payvand website:

And here are some super fancy eggs from another blog that the Noruz Bunny brings (She's totally owning you Easter Bunny!):


And here is our humble little haftseen.  This is the first year in many years that we haven't killed the fish before the actual holiday.  One year Things One and Two "fed" it pennies and cheerios and another year the cat got it.  Last year I didn't even bother getting one.  This year's fish is a betta fish, I'm hoping it will last longer than the goldfish did.  His name is Rambo since he's a fighting fish.  Watch out bitches, my fish will kick your ass!

Happy Noruz everyone!

Happy St. Patricks Day!

I have nothing green to wear!  So seeing as I have to go into school to take my last final exam and will be surrounded by 18-22 year old college students who will no doubt take every opportunity to pinch non-green wearing individuals, I am going to enter the black hole of doom, a.k.a. daughter's bedroom, to steal a green t-shirt from her.

If I'm not out by Friday, send in a search party.

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Revelry Recap

When we were deciding on a date for our wedding, I wanted to get married in December so we could decorate with Christmas decorations and colors (my favorite!) and husband's only stipulation was that we picked a date that was already a holiday so he wouldn't have to remember another random date.  (I don't know what he meant by ANOTHER random date because he has never once remembered my birthday or the kids birthday's correctly and he was THERE for the kids births!)

So we decided on New Year's Eve because who gets married on Christmas?  Santa would be all kinds of pissed off if we rained on his parade!

Fifteen years ago we got married.  We had been dating for almost exactly 6 months, I had moved in with him two weeks after our first date, I was nineteen while he was thirty-one and he was Iranian.  (If you mention the movie Not Without My Daughter I will cut you.)  It's amazing that my poor parents didn't drop dead from heart failure.  (What can I say, my life was on fast forward back then.  We got pregnant on our honeymoon too.)  But it all worked out beautifully and I love him more now than the day we got married.  I know him better now too!

Our fifteen year anniversary made this New Year's Eve special so we threw a party so our friends and family could help us drink to the occasion.  I learned some valuable lessons from this party and thought I would share them with all of you.

It is possible to have a successful bonfire in the back yard even with 12 inches of wet, slushy snow on the ground and very cold drizzly rainy weather.  Fireworks are also successful in such conditions ~ who knew?

Scientist Genius Brother is going to look exactly like Albert Einstein when his hair goes gray.  Especially if I mess it up for him.

Never ever play poker with this guy. (below)  ESPECIALLY when he is the only completely sober person at the table.  His name is Lucky and he will kick your ass from here to Mars.  But it's ok because he put up with all of us.  He was a complete stranger when he walked in the door and left as part of the family.  (But I still want a chance to beat him at poker in the future.) 

When Scientist Genius brother answers your query "Would you like another drink?" with "A shot of vodka, a beer and a glass of wine" it's probably not a good idea to bring him all three of his requests.  It's amusing at the time, but in the long run, not a good idea.

And last but not least, Nature's Miracle does not get the smell of vomit out of rugs.  They must be steam cleaned several times to achieve such a lofty goal.  (I have the best blackmail video footage ever!  My 35th birthday in March better be a REALLY good one!)

I hope you all enjoyed New Year's Eve as much as we did and did not feel as crappy on New Year's Day as certain individuals did!

Happy 2009!

Revelry Recap, Photos Only

What Happened?

2009?  Ooops, I missed the big intro.  I've been busy cleaning carpets - it was THAT GOOD of a party for some (and you know who you are!).

Happy New Year, I'm going back to bed!